


Steven's Fucking 16th Hamon Birthday

by Calicornia



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon), ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2019-07-07 12:17:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15908106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Calicornia/pseuds/Calicornia
Summary: Garnet dies in Infinity War.





	Steven's Fucking 16th Hamon Birthday

Pearl has never felt this way, the intense thrust of Rohan's cock made her feel like she was a rose growing in a field of corn. His hands slid up her skirt, grabbing her other gem if you know what I mean. The passion between the two radiated pure love, something you can't get at Walmart. A knock echoed from Pearl's gem, and Rohan seemed very afraid.

"Who in the actual sweet fuck could that possibly be?" Pearl question, mildly perplexed. Just then the bumper of an old blue pickup truck errupted from Pearl's gem and ran pink Lars the fuck over.

"Hohoho," a voice called from the drivers side window. Santa Claus emerged from the vehicle and approached the bubblegum lookin ass. "Its a good thing you're a zombie, young lady."

"Yare Yare daze," Jotaro sighed, lighting up a cigarette. Garnet lept into action and dropped all of her spaghetti, swatting the lit cigarette out of Jotaro's mouth. The cigarette flew into Amethyst's room and set the entire god foresaken trashpile ablaze. Amethyst, unfazed, ate a moldy burrito in the middle of the towering inferno.

Rohan Kishibe, world reknowned mangaka and notorious spaghetti dropper coward in fear behind the massive bara titties of the one and only All Maito.

"It has always been my duty to defend the week, meek and the useless!" All Might hollered at the sky, "Sideshow Bob, you're going down!" Sideshow Bob scoffed, and pulled out his chaos emerald.

"Guess what I'm gonna do with this." SSB chuckled, "Guess where I'm gonna put it." Rohan peed a little bit. There was no way it could be what he thought it meant, he destroyed it years ago.

"Stop this now!" All Might ran towards Sideshow Bob, his feet cracking the ground he stepped on, "You can't slide that up Pearl's ass" 

"PEARL!?" Bob maniacally guffawed, his skeletal hand clenched the emerald tightly, "I'M GONNA STICK IT IN THE FRIDGE!" Sideshow Bob raised his right palm and manifested a cold storage unit. 

"NO! YOU CAN'T STICK THAT IN THE FRIDGE!" Rohan shouted as he reached for the Chaos Emerald.

Suddenly, Bonic the Sedgehog burst through the door and engulfed the chaos emerald with his massive fucking nostril.

"THIS IS MY FINAL LIGMA!" Bonic twisted inside and became Caesar Zeppeli. 

"YOUR NEXT LINE IS 'WHATS LIGMA?!'" Joseph josephed from inside of Polnareffs slim jim man hair.

"WHATS LIGMA?!" Rock Lee errupted into a fountain of youthful tears.

"LIGMA BALLS" Gyro wryyyyyy-ed from the nth dimension, hurling his steel balls into Tonio's fresh lasagna. Steven curled into a ball and cried for hours.

Anf that's the story of how Todoroki Shouto, the illigitimate son of Garnet and Prince Zuko, punted the ultimate evil into space for all eternity and saved christmas.

The end?


End file.
